I Wrote My Own Obituary For A Class

Morbid, isn't it?

Very much so, but I choose to look at it from a different perspective. Instead of treating it solely as a memento mori or solely as an assignment towards my journalism degree, I took the opportunity to think about who I am to others and how I want to be remembered by them. 

Now, I'm not going to publish the obituary I wrote in its entirety here. One day an obituary will be published about me in whatever form of media we read when my time comes, but I still, Lord willing, have a lot of life to live.

I turn 20 tomorrow. And what better way to celebrate your birthday than thinking about your obituary! That was sarcasm... kind of. At the same time, this could very well mark a quarter-way point through my life. So, let me take this blog to reflect on my life so far and look forward to my life to come. For it's never too early to start becoming who you want to be remembered as. 

There are many aspects of me that make me who I am. People recognize these things about me. 

Here's a few in no particular order: I am a good writer, I am a good musician, I am short for a dude, and I have a deeply rooted aversion towards using subtitles in news articles.

I could stop there of course, and you'd know a little bit about me, but you wouldn't know "the important stuff." That's the character stuff that's hard to make into a list.

My obituary put it this way: 

He was known for saying, “I love you,” asking “How can I help?” and joking “Hi hungry, I’m Dad.”  They were the three things Mr. Gottry said most in life, and he talked a lot.

That is how I want to be remembered.

I want to be someone who says, "I love you" often. I want to say it to my family who have and will continue to shape me and help me become the man I want to be. I want to say it to my friends, both old friends and new ones, for these are the people that have walked through life with me as we figure it out together. I want to say it to whoever I marry and those I date along the way, for they are a more sacred kind of friend and one day a more sacred kind of family and ones who's burdens and successes I will share in that love. I want to say it to those who don't hear it often, for those are the people that need to hear it the most no matter if they deserve it or not. Finally, I want to say it to my God for he has done more sacrificially for me than any person could ever do for me.

I want to be someone who asks, "How can I help?" whenever I am able. When I sent out an instagram story asking for quotes from friends and family for my obituary, I was encouraged that many people mentioned my kindness. I want to be known as a patient, helpful, and kind individual. This first starts with listening. I want to grow to be a better listener, for I can't help if I don't know the full extent of the problem. I want to be patient in how I respond in every situation, always leading with a servant's heart. Finally, I want the kindness that Jesus showed to those he interacted with to work through me as I interact with friends, family, and strangers. 

Lastly, but not least-ly, I want to be someone who jokes, "Hi hungry, I'm Dad" as much as possible. While this point may seem trite and to many who are around me often, mildly irritating on occasion, I see it as a deeper-rooted character thing. I am an optimist by nature and I hope that never changes. I find joy in the little things and the hard things and the things in between, like dad jokes. Furthermore, I want to be a dad—maybe an uncle and a grandfather, too. No matter what I achieve in my life, I don't think anything could top helping to raise a family... and telling the worst best jokes along the way.

I think I've made a good impact these past 20 years. It hasn't been perfect, but no person is. At the very least, I think some people see these qualities in me and I think I am set up to continue to make my impact in a meaningful way.

I am grateful for all the memories I've made and the people with whom I've made them, regardless of whether these memories and people make it into my obituary one day. For now, I'm just focused on living the next 20 years. In that time, my resumé, my contact list, and my photos will grow. But I am more intent on growing my obituary, for I am more focused on becoming a good man, one who God wants me to be, than anything else.